Guest Blogger: Gossip Girl

Greetings, Upper Midwesterners. Gossip Girl here, with the latest on the high fashion wanna-bes visiting New York from Chicago.

Spotted: Kansas Farm Girl posing as NY socialite on Wednesday in the entrance to the Palace hotel. Word on the street was that she’d been meeting with the big wigs in the NY office of her fashionable ad agency across the street. But what’s a girl who forgot to bring a purse along to do when she’s heading out for dinner at fab-o restaurant Craftsteak in the meatpacking district? Sources say she skulked to Fifth Avenue for an emergency purchase. But upon seeing price tags of $1,000+ in the line of bag mini-boutiques lining the first floor of Saks, she darted for Kenneth Cole across the street. Our friend the greeter said she headed first to the white patent one on sale.  Looks like status is a hard thing to buy.

Overheard: The story didn’t end for our dear little Farm Girl. Sources on American flight 317 to Chicago said Farm Girl about vomited when she reached her seat on the plane from the “dirty diaper” stench. She was soon at the center of three rows of chatter about the smell before the group called over the flight attendant for help. Pretty soon the airplane tech was there too in his orange vest. Just as the two officials left the row, the woman behind Farm Girl (sporting a very tacky full-length fake mink and Valerie Bertinelli hair from the 80s), darted to the bathroom carrying her toy-poodle-show-dog in a little black bag. After another 15 minutes of waiting for her to come back, the flight attendant kicked the smelly dog lady off the plane. Unfortunately she’d left her poo-covered paper towels in the bathroom trash. Farm Girl wondered which one was the bitch – the dog, or the lady who sat there for 10 minutes keeping mum about her poo-spewing poodle.

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